I know some people feel differently than others, but my thought on friends is this: I would rather have a handful of really good quality friends, than a whole load of just 'friends'. Anybody with me on that?
Going through school, and I start this at 7th grade, because that is when I came to be my own girl, I had friends, and I had a good number of them. They weren't all friends with each other, but I was friends with many of them. Then came high school. Which I loathed those four years of my life. Man, I thought that time in my life was the pits.
And it's funny to me to see where we've all ended up today, we may have been friends in Maine, or Alaska, maybe we knew each other a while, or were separated at some point, but...you truly have got love Facebook.
I now truly do have a handful of really good friends, and I have some work friends, and I have some people that I say are friends, but we just have an acquaintanceship, and that's ok with me. I've been put through a lot over the past two and a half years. Some of the 'things' I have been though have been my own doing, some have been the outcome of others actions, and some things, well, I suppose just happen by chance.
Life is a funny thing, and it's much shorter than we could ever imagine. My job keeps me very busy, and every day I have stuff of my calendar. It's like I can't even catch a break. My elders always told me time would fly as I got older...I believe that now. And I hate it.
I go to therapy at least every other week. I love the time I have with my therapist. She is an amazing woman, who I know next to nothing about, yet she knows every little thing about me. We talk about friends of mine, people who I want to be friends with, people who have crossed me, who I feel have left me, people who know me, and people who I love with all my heart has.
I know that I'm rambling a little, but my point is this. I've been hurt in my life. I have been betrayed, I have forgiven, I've lost, and I have forgotten. I've done, and I have said I was sorry. None of us can go back to right the wrongs. None of us can change the way other people feel, or the things that other people do, we can't make decisions for others, and others can't make decisions for us. We are our very own people. And what a beautiful thing that is.
I saw this on Pinterest earlier.
Is it wrong that I truly feel that way about maybe 3 or 4 people on my Facebook? Some times I just want to take these people by the shoulders screaming "What the hell is wrong with you? Don't you see that you're wasting your life feeling bad about yourself?" Life is so precious. You don't know when your last day is upon you. You don't know when you're going to lose a loved one to a medical issue, to a freak accident, or to a problem that arose between the two of you... You can't get lost time back. You truly have to make the most of it.
I have one person who I will say is my best friend. I used to use the term 'best friend' loosely, because I have many best friends. They all know everything about me, or who I was up til I was whatever age I was when we were 'besties.' I have one friend who I consider my best friend in the whole entire world. I would do almost anything for that woman. She is beautiful. She is strong and compassionate. She loves and she bleeds truth. I admire her strength. She is human, she makes mistakes, but she is always honest. And that is the one thing I love about anyone. Be honest. Be honest with yourself, and be honest to others. Own your life, and own your actions and words.
Life is too short. If you love someone, tell them. And don't say it if you don't mean it. Don't go to bed angry, and don't expect someone else to make your life better. You're the only one who can make your life what you want. Well, you and God I suppose. There is power in prayer.
Be blessed, blog friends. I'm leaving you with this very funny picture of a cat I found last night. And if you're not giggling like a teenager, you need to spend more time enjoying life and less time being angry.
If this were my cat, which I don't even like cats, I'd call him "Murray."
Night, y'all!
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